there is no "i'll start tomorrow"...
"ima wait til sunday because it's the beginning of the week"
"i can't start today, it's the 29th of the month. i'll start on the 1st"
"i have this dinner to go to in 4 days so why start now? i'll just wait til after that"
"i haven't worked out in two weeks and i'm going on vacation next week so why even bother THIS week?"
blah blah blah.
i'm just realizing more and more that it comes down to what i want for myself TODAY. am i gonna be a total waste today or am i gonna take care of myself? my body is like a well-oiled machine and i feel excellent when i'm eating well, working out, drinking water, getting rest, etc...some days i just wanna check out and do a little zombie-eating (eating to numb out and escape) and i ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS regret it. it's just not worth it. i like to wake up and feel good. i like to get dressed and feel good. i like to look in the mirror and not wanna vomit. i like to not envy every skinny girl i see because i feel so gross about me.
my mom made a pineapple upside down cake last night and today is my lazy sunday and of course i want my lazy sunday to include cake for breakfast. but if i eat it then this whole day is gonna feel like shit. i'm a food addict, i can't have cake for breakfast and move on. i'm so sensitive to that shit. eating cake today doesn't line up with my goals so just for today, i'm gonna pass. here's to another bottle of water...
happy eating! xo
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