up until like, what?...4 days ago? i can't remember...i was drowning. people were throwing me lifesavers but i'd only hold on for a little until i thought i could swim on my own again. so finally i got tired of keeping myself just above water and decided to hop in the first boat i saw. the boat was red. and it's probably the safest boat i've ever been in.
my red boat looks like this:
1. no sugar or flour ever. no matter what.
2. work a full 12-step program
3. call people in my group every day. at least 3. and it only counts if i reach someone.
4. write for 15 minutes a day. every day.
5. give up artificial sweeteners completely. weigh and measure everything. no matter what.
6. if i want to eat something not on my plan, i have to call the captain of the ship (my sponsor) or she'll kick me out of the boat and make me find a new one.
7. i have to commit my food and talk to my sponsor daily.
8. experience true freedom and sanity and happiness and actually like being alive
this seems like a really fucking intense boat right? well here are some other boats i've been in...
purple boat: do whatever i want and gain all the weight back that i've lost and want to kill myself
green boat: work a half-ass program and gain some of my weight back AND become an insane crazy lunatic and lose my relationship with God and become a horrible wife, daughter, coworker, employee, friend, sister, and hate waking up in the morning and feel a sense of dread every day.
i like the red boat the best. i have to work really hard but it's what i gotta do to stay sane, happy, joyous, and free.
happy eating! xo
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